Filthy Casual Reviews: HOW TO COMMISSION ME!

This post is a long time coming.

I usually do my own thing, here on the blog. I review what games I want. I review what shows and movies I want. I review what wrestling I want. I make the art I want.

And that's great!

But I'm a lonely birb, and sometimes it's nice to get suggestions! To that end, here's how you can get me to review something you want (or make art you want me to make!) by bribing me I mean commissioning me via Ko-Fi!

WRESTLING

Wrestling PPV and show reviews are currently on hold as I do not have access to NJPW or other networks, reliably. If, however, you want to have me review something wrestling-related on YouTube, buy me 1 (one) coffee on my Ko-Fi account per full hour of the video and leave a link in the message (or your email address or Twitter handle if the link won't fit or something).

Bear in mind that my Niblings may find this blog, so I try to keep things PG more or less. No Sunny Side Up or Queen of the Ring or apartment wrestling, please.

BOOKS

Oh my god please recommend books to me! If you just read something and want me to check it out, by all means just leave a comment on my page. If you're super adamant that I read something and you really, really want a review, you can @ me on Twitter or leave a comment on the blog, and I'll do my best, but if my library doesn't have a copy, I may be out of luck. If you're super duper passionate and, say, slipped me the cost of a copy via Ko-Fi, then I guess I'd be honor-bound to buy and review it, wouldn't I?

GAMES

I love playing games on my computer! I really really love it! So if you have any free-to-play, zero-cost games you want me to review, shoot me a single coffee on Ko-fi and I'll get right on it! Currently, I can get things through Steam, itch.io, Kongregate, Newgrounds, etc. I also do not have a gaming laptop. Currently, I'm using a fairly vanilla business-level Dell Latitude, to give you an idea of the graphics intensity I'm working with lol. This puppy chugs playing voxel games sometimes.

I also have access to a Gamecube, an N64, a Nintendo 3D XL, and a Switch, but none are modded and I do not have Switch Online, so unless you wanna talk to me about shipping a game to me (which is most easily done via Twitter), they'll have to be occasional featurettes if I find cheap games at thrift stores.

The Nibling Alert warning applies here, too. No Adult games, please. And please have mercy on me - I don't know if my palpitation-prone heart can withstand most Scary games. I mean, the original Resident Evil games are kinda my limit (pre-VII) for spook-factor, and I really hate jump-scares.

MOVIES/TV

I would love to do movie or tv show reviews! If you've got an old standby that you'd like to hear my opinions on, feel free to send me 1 coffee per hour of movie or 1 coffee per episode with a message directing me to what you want, and I'll try to review them. I currently do not have cable, but I may be able to find things via YouTube or YouTube TV or any of the free Roku-based channels out there (like Shout Factory, Pluto, the Roku App, etc).

I don't have Disney+. Sorry!

RECIPES

Yes, sometimes I cook, but if you've got a recipe you're dying for me to try, it might be better to reach out via Twitter or the comments, due to ingredient costs and availability. Also bear in mind that I have some restrictions for what I can and cannot (or will or will not) make. My hard no's are:

Shellfish of any kind
Octopus, squid, cuttlefish
Melons of any kind
Cocktails or other Alcoholic beverages
Organ meats/Offal
Anything from Cooking With Jack. Just don't. Do not.
Peppers that have to be handled with gloves (why would you do that to me?!)
Game (I have no access)

ART

I am not yet confident in my ability to do anything like a proper commission for you like you might get from a professional artist. However! If you'd like to have a say in what I make, you can buy me a coffee and leave a message telling me which of the following categories you'd like to see that week:

Animal - A random animal or person
Vegetable - A random plant or fungus or algae
Mineral - A random geologic object like a rock or a gem
Geometric - An abstract, geometric piece
Dedbert - the little green owl at the start of most posts on this blog, doing something random.
Word - either bubble art based on a word of your choice or a word of your choice outlined in multiple colors
Location - a landscape

If you send 2 (two) coffees, you can either request two categories, or you can choose what medium I use!

Pencil
Pencil & Ink
Marker
Colored Pencil
Watercolor
Digital

When I feel like I'm ready, I'll start selling originals and doing legitimate commissions. For now, however, you can check my Redbubble store for prints and fun items (including facemasks, bags, mugs, and more!)