Game of the Week:
Pokefarm Q
Long, long ago, I
heard of a game called Pokefarm on the internet. It’s a simple fan
game, but not anything like the actual Pokemon games I’m used to.
They came up with their own Pokemon designs, their own professors,
their own world, really. Eventually, as all things tend to do, things
went awry and the site split up like icebergs struck by global
warming trends, and something new was revealed.
Pokefarm Q is the
resurrected idea of a forum-based community surrounding a Pokemon
game. It’s basically what it says on the tin – you farm Pokemon.
Remember that old episode of the cartoon where Ash wound up on the
Miltank ranch? Ever wanted one of your own? Now you can! And it’s
absolutely free!
I’m not going to
say much about the forums, since I never use them, but as a very
casual player, I can tell you, it’s engrossing. You start out by
making your trainer card (are you a boy, a girl, or gender-neutral?)
and picking a name (I’m Tenleybean, y’all, come visit), and
naming your farm (mine’s called Peacevale). Then you’re given the
opportunity to pick your starter. And here’s where the game begins
to show you what you’re getting into – you can start with any
starter from any game. Wanna start with Pikachu or Eevee? Do it. Do
you Liek Mudkipz? Do it. Do you wanna be a basic bitch and start with
Charmander, Bulbasaur, or Squirtle? Do it. And do it with the
knowledge that you will be
able to get all the other starters at some point.
After you get your starter, you can start adopting eggs at the lab
with Professor Holly. She’ll have an array of eggs at the ready.
You have a party of up to 6 eggs at a time. They won’t tell you
what they are until they hatch. Really, the game will hold your hand
through the starting months – I’ve just lost New Farmer status
(which they mark on your profile/name with a Bulbasaur bulb). You
gain ranks by hatching and trading (yes there’s trading) and
adopting Pokemon, which unlock special currency, special modes, and
more.
Then there’s the complex badge system. You can, eventually, go talk
to a Jirachi named Ravyne (who I’m pretty sure is also one of the
Mods, but again, I don’t use the forums, much). This Jirachi will
take the gems you gain from your Pokemon hatching and turn them into
badges which give you bonus XP when hatching and leveling specific
types. You can only fully construct these badges by evolving Pokemon.
All of this is conveyed in a manner so hyperactive and
incomprehensible that the page automatically translates Ravyne’s
suger-hyped speech into plain old English (or whatever you’re using
for a language, I’d imagine).
If
you’ve gotten bored with the old Pokemon, fear not, they have
Fakemon to make you happy here, too. There
are puffballs that evolve into spiders, something that looks like a
cross between a Deerling and a Houndoom, more foxes than you can
shake a stick at, and colorful snakes that you’ll be super jealous
of other people owning.
Now, this blog isn’t supposed to just be me telling you how to play
a game, but here’s the basics – you click buttons. That’s how
you play. You click on a berry to feed your Pokemon (which grants
them XP), you click on people’s names to visit their farms and
click berries to feed their Pokemon. You click a button to go
fishing, where some dialog pops up now and then to set the mood for
you before you click another button to reel in the Slowpoke,
Carvanha, Surskit, Magikarp, etc. Yeah, you can catch Goldeen,
Slowpoke, and Carvanha with an Old Rod, which I dig. Also, you don’t
battle these caught Pokemon, you chuck rocks in their faces and then
beg their forgiveness with bait (please don’t run, level 12
Slowpoke, Tenleybean needs you!) before you pelt them with your free
balls.
You can also buy balls and bait with in-game currency, called
credits, which you get for, you guessed it, clicking on people’s
Pokemon to feed them. This includes your own. You can be as
self-centered as you like and you’ll still advance.
One of the things I’ve really enjoyed seeing are the new ideas that
this group has brought to Pokemon. Besides the Shiny Pokemon we’ve
been enjoying since that Red Gyarados in the Lake of Rage, they’ve
come up with Albino, Melanistic, and Delta variants. Albinos are, of
course, white or washed-out pallet variants of the normal mons, but
if you have an Albino variant who also hatches as a shiny? Then you
get a Melanistic (black or darkened) version! As for Delta, I’m not
clear on that one, since I’ve only seen the name once on someone’s
field where all of their Pokemon were surrounded by a colored
outline. Very odd.
Besides the awesome variants (god, I want a melanistic Ninetales…)
they have also come up with their own Mega Evolutions for various
Pokemon. Their Mega Druddigon is fascinating. You have to earn the
mega ring doing certain tasks (viewable in the Party tab), but after
that, it’s a matter of scouring up, buying, or earning Mega Stones.
Scouring is one of my favorite aspects of this game. You select up to
three Pokemon in your party or fields, you send them to one of
several locations (Ocean, Volcano, Desert, Forest, etc), and they
come back in a couple hours with swag. This might be stuff you can
dress up your Pokemon with for one of the many contests the site
runs, or it might be berries, or it might be evolution items, mega
stones, credits, currency, boxes, or they might come home empty
handed. Different Pokemon have different preferences – Your female
Squirtle who prefers Spicy berries and hates Sour ones and has a
Sassy nature may love the Ocean and hate the City, but another
identical Squirtle may love the City and hate the Volcano.
The
boxes you sometimes find while scouring are a crapshoot – you don’t
know what you’re gonna get. You will,
however, get something.
It could be the second type of currency, gold Poke, or it could be
more dress up accessories, or evolution items, etc. But you’ll
always get something. And since they’re free, it’s awesome. Also,
you can sell anything on the Marketplace tab for credits.
There are three currencies: Credits (which you earn via
interactions), Gold Poke (which can be earned through missions or
found in boxes), and Zophan canisters, which are the only thing you
have to pay for that I’ve found, so far. These canisters are used
for premium content, which, yeah, makes your life easier, but you can
also earn the premium content through missions, I’ve found. The
only reason to buy canisters is to support the site itself and keep
the forums open.
I haven’t even begun to touch on the humor of this game, the deep
lore, the great illustrations, but that’s what the link is for –
you should definitely check it out for yourself!
Happy Gaming, everyone
and pay poor Tenleybean a visit – he’s lonely.
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