Filmic Friday 305: Highway To Hell 1991

In Which ... Ok, You know what? I have No Idea what I just watched.

Once upon a time, my partner and I were feeling pretty sleepy and wanted to zone out, so we threw on a random movie that we liked the look of. That movie was  Highway To Hell, starring Rob Lowe's brother, Chad. We were anticipating that the movie would be allegorical, or metaphorical, or anything else besides literal because... why would you write a movie about a literal highway leading to the Devil's domain when there is so much else you could do with the title?

I should note that, since we knew this was a film from the early 1990s, we were sure it wasn't anything like the 2016 horror flick of the same name.

Well, we were right about that second bit - it's not a slasher movie.

It sure is something, though...

And no, this poster isn't lying. Much.

We open the film normally enough, with Charlie Sykes (Chad Lowe) and his girlfriend Rachel (Kristy Swanson) eloping to Las Vegas. They're on the road in Charlie's pizza delivery car, but after a scare with a police officer following them (Charlie remarks that their elopement is potentially illegal, and Rachel confesses that she left her mother a note, thus making Charlie believe that Rachel's mom has called the cops on him), they end up on a back road in the middle of nowhere. Rachel rebuffs Charlie when he tries to bang her in the back of his Pinto (uh, also, his dog, Mr. Ben, is in the car with them, wtf Charlie, stop), and to his credit, Charlie agrees to hold off until the honeymoon.

It's nice to see a movie with such sleeze potential back off from having a young woman lose her virginity in a crappy car in the desert.

What I didn't realize was that this moment is integral to the plot!

This film has a nearly Hocus Pocus level obsession with virginity, it seems.

So, after stopping at the only gas station for miles, the couple are warned not to fall asleep on the road until they've passed two Joshua Trees. The old man in charge of the gas station begs them to stay the night, and, being a young white couple in what I was beginning to suspect was a horror movie, they again threw my expectations by saying they'd be okay and continuing on.

This, too, is integral to the plot.

See, Mr. Ben the dog and Rachel the girlfriend fall asleep while Charlie drives, and because no one is awake to talk to him, Charlie, too drifts off near a defaced billboard where a cop car awaits.

Charlie wakes up before having an accident and tries to gather himself as the cop approaches. But it's not a normal cop. This bald demon is the Hellcop, and he kidnaps Rachel, knocking both Charlie and Mr Ben out.

All while looking suspiciously like a bald, disfigured Toby Maguire in Spiderman 3

Charlie ends up back at the gas station and begs the old man for help. The old man tells him that the Hellcop kidnaps pretty girls, which he knows because the Hellcop also stole his pretty girlfriend back in the day, which is why he has the gas station and why he'd begged them to stay the night. Charlie's desperation moves him, and he gives the young man his old car, which he'd modified to survive a literal trip into Hell, a magic gun which seems to work with shotgun shells, and advice. Charlie then goes to Hell to save Rachel.

I'm going to try to avoid too many more spoilers, but you have to understand, we weren't expecting Rob Lowe's brother to literally drive into Hell and fight a demon cop while exploring the beautiful desert landscape.

Along his journey, Charlie meets several characters, including Mr Beezle (whose true identity I'd guessed in seconds, what with the painfully obvious name) and Adam, a young boy who was also kidnapped by the Hellcop. Since Adam is a living being down in Hell, he's been trying to escape. He's also a little creepy, and I had him pegged for a secret demon, but... spoilers... he's not. He's just a weird, kinda creepy kid. I mean, if I watched a creepy demon dude gun down my family and my dog when I was barely more than a toddler, I'd probably be a bit weird, too.

So now Charlie has three souls to save - Rachel's, Adam's, and his own. Mr Ben is never in any real danger.

Did I mention that Mr Beezle is played by Patrick Bergin?

A few interesting points of note:

1) The entire Stiller family plays different roles in Hell. Ben is a psychotic short-order cook, Jerry is an undead Desk Sergeant who tries to steal from Sgt Bedlam (the Hellcop), and Amy Stiller is Cleopatra.
2) Gilbert Gottfried is Hitler. You cannot prepare yourself for that.
3) The set design is both incredible and ridiculous, and if you have any understanding of pop culture and/or mythology, you're going to get a lot of laughs (the diner is called "Pluto", there's a casino called "Hoffa's", and there are multiple references to different takes on the afterlife)
4) No one is giving a half-assed performance. Everyone's trying their best, and that makes it more fun and surreal!

Ben Stiller smashing eggs on his head to make headcheese omelets on the sidewalk outside The Pluto

Hoffa's, which is stop-motion animated and looks awesome!

Yes, there's a scene with Cerberus.
Yes, it's more or less mythologically accurate.
No you aren't prepared for how they bypass him.

Eventually, Charlie gets to take a shortcut (with the help of the old man's lost love, who has elected to remain in Hell, as she now feels it's what she deserves), but as with most things in the afterlife, he's presented with a choice. That choice is whether or not to sleep with Rachel, who is super into him when he finds her. He knows something's up, though, and eventually, he catches sight of her reflection, which... uh... isn't her.

And yes, this is some amazing prosthetic work.
The costume looks amazing and moves perfectly with the actor!

Eventually, Charlie defeats the succubus and goes on to find the real Rachel practicing violin, waiting for the Devil. She's thrilled to see Charlie, though, and agrees to escape with him. The Devil, of course, is quite annoyed by all of this, but he's a being of deals, so he agrees that if Rachel and Charlie leave without looking back, they can go.

It's an overall fairly bog-standard escape attempt against the Devil's minions

Of course, that's not enough, so the movie ends with a race against the Hellcop to escape from Hell and Mr Beezle (who, shocker, turned out to be the Devil the whole time). They get Adam to come with them, and the race is on. It's a fun chase sequence, and the stunt driving is pretty awesome. I liked every second of it, and honestly, it's one of the better race sequences I've seen.

The movie itself is neither a "good" movie nor a bad movie. It's a bizarre movie, and it defies proper explanation.

If you have a fever, or if you're just looking for a good-but-weird time, definitely check out this movie!

Also: the dog is 100% okay by the end of the movie, if that's the kind of thing that is important to you.

So yeah, go watch Highway to Hell, directed by Ate de Jong! It's a great time :)

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Thursday Art Walk 305: The Family Business

In Which Ma Boi Takes on the Work

Daily weather update: it's currently sunny and 28℉ (-2.2℃). I'm both eager and not eager to go for my daily walk (it's gonna be cold, but it'll also give me that sweet, sweet Vitamin D my body craves so deeply... yes, lol, it wants the D. Yours would, too, if you rarely got to see the sun for 2/3 of the year...)

I joke a lot about Dedbert being my son, so why not have a picture of him doing what I do?

"The Family Business"; graphite and ink on sketch paper; 2020

Dedbert here is hard at work at the ol' WordyBirdy Typewriter, click-clack-dinging his way to a proper manuscript. To be honest, I'm a lil jelly because I don't have a typewriter of my own to type on, and the WordyBirdy seems quite nice. Then again, I type a little faster than him, and that model seems to be more meant for the ol' hunt-and-peck style of typing.

I might color this in at some point, or I might start over and make a bigger, better version. For now, I'm quite pleased with this ink sketch.

The title's a bit of a brag, to be honest. I like to write (I mean, otherwise, I'd probably just make bland, ranty YouTube videos instead of a blog), and since I'm currently working on a novel, that makes writing my business. My partner, who I only half-jokingly refer to as Dedbert's other parent, is also a really good writer, so of course our son wants to join in on the family business.

And yes, we're both very proud of our boy for Doing the Work, as Cody Rhodes puts it.

Now, if y'all will excuse us, my feathery son and I need to get back to work :)

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Wednesdaymania 305: What's Up In Wrestling?

In Which I Discuss Wrestling News

What is new in the world of wrestling this week?

WWE

• Edge came back, which I have mixed feelings about because he looks great but he's doing a bunch of spears when that's what destroyed his neck not that long ago. Still, my younger sibling likes Edge, so maybe this will get a bunch of people back into wrestling.
• I hear Booker T is getting back in the ring! Originally, I'd heard that he was going to be doing this on WWE, but it turned out that he's going to be getting back in the ring in his  G.I. Bro gimmick in his own promotion instead. Awesome. Hope he's feeling alright.
• I'm really pleased that WWE let Drew McIntyre win, not surprised that Charlotte won the women's rumble, hope that Asuka at least looked strong despite her loss to Becky Lynch (who, btw, still rocks as champ).
• Looks like literally all of my favorites are injured right now. Vince, people do actually need rest. Just because a previous generation literally crippled themselves for your profits doesn't mean that this generation should have to.
• I'm slowly catching up on NXT! Very slowly. Bear with me.

NWA

• I love Powerrr
• I'm still not 100% on board with this whole Question Mark gimmick, but people seem to love it, so that's cool
• Ricky Starks, Eli Drake, and Nick Aldis continue to be incredible
• I like the raucous crowds and how the wrestlers all interact with each other, the crew, and the crowd to create a very intimate show that feels incredibly accessible while also running very smoothly
• Sean Mooney is on the show now, and that makes both myself and my partner very, very happy. Guy sounds like a million bucks.
• Digging the Nick/Marty storyline
• Thunder Rosa = $$$

NJPW

• Kota Ibushi comes first on this list of news, not because he's a wrestling god (which he is), but because in addition to the fairly sever flu he's suffering, he also tore the area between his esophagus and his stomach. While this is an uncommon injury, it's also one that can be healed with rest and likely switching to a bland diet until it's recovered (maybe don't put wasabi on an open wound?). Best wishes for Ibushi's speedy and complication-free recovery!
• I still miss Liger, but his Twitter page is a riot, so if you need to smile, go check him out!
• I hope that both Karl Fredericks and Will Ospreay recover from their injuries quickly. Ospreay broke his foot during that barn-burner he had with Hiromu Takahashi. Fredericks suffered an injury to his right shoulder and has to miss the rest of the New Beginning USA shows. Boo.

AEW

• That Rock n Rager @ Sea thing was incredible. I've never seen wrestling on a cruise ship and did not expect it to be as incredible as it was! And it was incredible!
• I was not expecting Mr. Goody-Goody himself, Brandon Cutler to pull the move he did during this week's episode of Dark, but I'm glad to see the Dark Order getting its hooks into someone as close to the Bucks as him. Nice Storytelling.
• I am a bit concerned that we're going to discover that the big bad in the Dark Order is secretly JR, though. There were a couple of moments in Dark where that might have occurred to me. It's too bad it's not Marty, but hey, if someone offered me the chance to book a wrestling promotion and dropped six figures on me, you'd better believe I'd take it.
• I love the dynamic everyone has with Marko Stunt. I knew the guy was money when I first saw him, and I'm glad I wasn't wrong. Also, it's nice to have a wrestler to look up to who I don't have to physically look up to. We're about the same height.
• This show is just plain great, and I am really loving the way Tony Schiavone gets treated on BTE and Dark. It's good to see him (and really, most people working for AEW!) looking so healthy and genuinely happy to be at work. It's not something I am used to after having watched so much WWE.
• I am eager to see who else joins the roster, now that this new deal is inked and such.

On the topic of Sumo, it's a little harder to follow this season, so I don't have much to add besides this:

Sumo is good, and I like it.

Alright, that'll about do it for me today!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Talk About Tuesday 305

In Which There Is Much To Discuss

It's a gray and gloomy day - not at all like the cold-yet-mostly-sunny day I was promised last night. At 33℉ (0.6℃), it's chillier than it has been all week, but I'm okay with that. The cold might clear my fuzzy head. I don't sleep well, this time of year, which locals call "False Spring". It's both too cold to sleep without heavy blankets but too warm to be comfortable in them. My neck sweats while my toes freeze.

Welcome to that sweet New England life so many people dream of. It's mud and ice and sleepless nights listening to coyotes scream at raccoons at the local dump while your neighbor leaves their stupidly bright front light on, casting shadows of the neighbor's aging tree into your room, which is coincidentally exactly where that tree will land if it's not trimmed next year.

New England is, by its very nature, a stressful place.

Where isn't?

Grumpy thoughts aside, I really am looking forward to today. Yesterday, I was treated to some fantastic Thai food (well, I had Korean pork, but the restaurant is a Thai restaurant), watched a completely insane movie that my partner and I were both sure would just be an allegory but instead barreled straight ahead into the madness, and talked about writing at great length. It was just about a perfect day, which bodes well for today, to be honest.

But you're not here to hear about my day, you're here about the week. Please do bear in mind that due to the novel (which is coming along!) I may skip a day here and there to work on writing.

• Tomorrow I'd like to talk some about the crazy cruise ship adventures from AEW
• Thursday I should have some art to show you
• Friday will either be about Highway to Hell or Hereditary or Poltergeist: The Legacy
• Saturday will probably involve a tower defense game, believe it or not
• Sunday will probably involve noodles :P
• Monday will be more progress (I hope!) on the shrug
• Next Tuesday I'll blather more about life, the weather, the blog, and writing

Speaking of writing! I'm not sure how much is going to stick around, but I'm 3k words into Part 2 of my novel, so let's hope I can keep up the pace. Also, let's hope I can really crystallize what I'm doing in this book into a solid idea. I always second-guess myself. I think I'm doing things right, though, so I'll keep going.

How are your guys' 2020 projects going? Are you writing a book or poetry or plays or something? Are you drawing? Making comics? Sewing, knitting, crocheting, crafting? You can do it, whatever it is! And if you make mistakes, you can learn from them, apply that knowledge gained, and improve your work! You guys rock!

Go Enjoy Something

FC

Fiber Monday 305: Slow Growth

In Which Everything Grows Slowly

I knew when I started the Downton Abbey Lady Sibyl Shrug that it would be slow going. I was using the wrong-sized yarn, the wrong-sized hook, and I was starting it at the same time as my novel project (which is going fairly well!). Still...

I'd hoped to have more than a single inch of the garment finished by this week.

Life intervened, however, and now I'm at about 0.75" finished, unblocked. At least I know now that it will take at least 16 pattern repeats to make the garment? Because it's supposed to be 15" wide (38cm). I have very wide arms, however, so it's probably going to be more like 16" (40.6cm) wide.

So it's probably going to be anywhere from 17 to 30 pattern repeats.

Why such a broad range? Because I absolutely stink at eyeballing progress.

Also, because I'll be fitting the garment as I near the end.

But What does all of this mean for future Fiber Mondays? It just means you'll be seeing a whole lot of this color yarn, really.

I've got more rows to complete, words to type, and food to consume and discuss, today, though, so I'll let you all go.

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Survival Sunday 304: Kimchi Stirfry

In Which I Eat The Leaf

We received a lovely Kimchi Stir Fry kit in one of our recent Umai Crates, and since both of us really, really like kimchi, it seemed like we should get on that.

But we didn't.

For weeks.

Because 1) I'm lazy and 2) we kept forgetting to pick up kimchi.

But then we got the kimchi, some bacon, and some scallions, so I set to work preparing our stirfry!

The stirfry in question.

The prepackaged items included some delicate vermicelli noodles and a small packet of what we were informed was some kind of gochujang sauce. Easy enough, right? It's all the same spices as you'd get in kimchi, mixed with noodles.

But we wanted more than clear noodles in a rich red sauce (though that sounded delicious).

It also came with "instructions"...

The directions in the actual booklet were confusing and almost no help at all. See, we had been under the impression that the bag contained some kind of kimchi, but there wasn't any. It doesn't even suggest kimchi under the "try it with" section. Not very promising. Also - the instructions call for sesame oil (not included or suggested) and heating everything over medium which... uh... that doesn't always work.

So instead, I sliced up some bacon into about one inch chunks, my awesome partner chopped up some green onions and ran out to grab some kimchi (really, really good kimchi) and we decided to wing it.

Choppy choppy

A locally made kimchi, no less!

So I followed the instructions and grabbed our sesame oil... it's spicy so I usually proceed with caution.

It's really good, though...

 I dumped a small amount in a frying pan and got ready to make up the rest of the food.

Spicy sesame oil always looks vaguely horrifying in a clean frying pan...

Once we got the stovetop up to temp, we chucked in the kimchi, green onion/scallion, and bacon to fry together. Here's where you may be guessing my first problems arose:

I'm a big weenie and I'm scared of grease burns.

To be clear, I still cooked with it (though I had to hand it off in the end for the final few minutes because it was spattering me and I was trying not to freak out) and it was delicious. If you don't like cooking bacon, though, stick with the pre-cooked stuff. It's still delicious (it's bacon, after all) and it's still pretty dang awesome. I haven't cooked turkey bacon before, so I don't know if it has a similar issue with spattering.

Experiments for other times lol.

While the bacon was rendering and the oil was coating everything and the liquid was cooking out of the kimchi, we added both the sauce and the noodles. We didn't presoak the vermicelli - we just let it soak up the in-pan goodness. We didn't even have to add water!

Maybe if we got it again, I would add a little water, though, to help deglaze the bottom of the pan. Still, it came up well after a brief soak, so don't be too concerned over your pan's well-being.

Eventually, the noodles were soft, the bacon was cooked, and the kitchen smelled like gochujang and happiness, so we dumped it all in a bowl and took it back to the table. No chopsticks here - we were going for the four-pronged food shovel one might call a fork. Why? Because we were hungry and didn't want to spend forty minutes clumsily trying to wield chopsticks.

No matter how many times I use them, I still struggle for the first five minutes as my Irish-American fingers confusedly stumble around.

And who wouldn't want to just shovel this into their face?

If I were to try this again, from the comfort of my own home, this is what I'd do:

INGREDIENTS:

• Kimchi
• Either vermicelli or wide rice noodles (like for pad thai)
• Bacon (precooked or non-pork)
• Green onion/Scallion
• An Egg
• Sesame oil (plain)
• Gochujang and/or sriracha sauce (probably both)
• Fish sauce
• Soy sauce
• Peanuts and/or sesame seeds
• Possibly peanut butter?

TO MAKE:

1. Chop up any big ingredients (bacon, scallion). If using pad thai noodles, soak them in hot water until soft.
2. Dribble a bunch of sesame oil in the bottom of a fairly good-sized pan, turn heat to medium or medium-high
3. Start cooking the kimchi, protein, and green onion/scallion together in the oil
4. As the pan-fried foods start to look cooked, add your egg. You can either scramble it ahead of time or just let the scrambling happen as you move things around in the pan.
5. Start adding sauces, buttercup. Let your heart be your guide. Do you like fishier flavors? More fish sauce. Don't like fishy flavors? Less fish sauce. Want to have your sinuses pressure washed? Add more gochujang and/or sriracha. Add soy sauce if you think there's not enough lubrication. Add peanut butter at this stage if you want a  more pad thai-like experience.
6. Add them noodles and stir everything together until either a) you can't stand to look at it anymore and just have to eat it or b) things are starting to look 100% done and you want to eat it.
7. Plate that goodness and sprinkle on some crushed peanuts or some sesame seeds for garnish. Maybe a few fresh scallions or whatever if you're feeling extra fancy/are serving this on a date.
8. That pan's probably pretty crusty right now. Go soak it while you eat. Future dishwasher you will thank hungry-but-sensible you. I promise.

So that's my idea for next time I'm craving a kimchi stirfry!

How about you guys? Have you ever bought a convenience food and realized you could make it yourself? Do you have any suggestions for future recipes? Let me know!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Saturday Casual Gaming 304: WRITING DAY

Filmic Friday 304: Martial Law (1990)

In Which This Is Not The TV Show of The Same Name

Once upon a time, martial arts movies were all the rage. Van Dam, Carradine, Chan, and Segal were kings of action and karate chops, but there was another.

No, not Chad McQueen (though he is in this movie and is, ostensibly, the star).

Cynthia.
Freakin.
Rothrock.

She was the queen of action movies, a five-discipline master (Tang Soo Do, Tae Kwon Do, Wushu, and Eagle Claw, Northern Shaolin and Pai Lum Tao Kung Fu), and a fellow teeny-rager (she's 5'3", the same height as me!).

And she ruled the 1990s.

Heck, if you like video games, specifically Mortal Kombat, she's the inspiration for Sonya Blade!!!

So of course I've watched some of her movies.

Most recently, I saw Martial Law, a 1990s vehicle for Rothrock, David Carradine, and Chad McQueen (who, yes, he's Steve McQueen's son).

Oof. He doesn't even get billing on the cover of this copy?
He's literally the main character!

Martial Law is a very silly story about Chad's character, Sean Thompson. Sean is a cop whose brother (played by Andy McCutcheon) has fallen in with some very bad dudes (David Carradine). His girlfriend, Billie Blake (Rothrock) is also a cop who helps him take down the villains and is also really hot.

Sounds like a pretty generic story, right?

Okay, but get this - the whole movie is insane.

We open with a hostage situation. Chad McQueen shows up as a Dominos delivery guy. He delivers the hostage-takers a pizza at the request of the cops, and once they decide to be rude and stiff him, he beats them down with marital arts. There's a quick quip about another success for "Marital Law" (cue that one Family Guy meme...) and we get our credit sequence.

Crazy, right? Not crazy enough for you?

Okay, how about this:

David Carradine is basically playing Bill from Kill Bill, running an evil dojo to train people to steal things for him or kill people for him. He's a mob boss, and if you fail him, he kills you. He runs guns, steals cars, and I'm sure there are drugs involved, too, because it's the 1990s. It's... also a shockingly clean movie, though. Because despite having women in it, no one gets raped. Which is... really unusual for a 90s action movie with boobs.

Actually, since it's Rothrock, she basically gets to run the show when it comes to how her body is used.

That being said, I really, really wish I hadn't seen Chad McQueen mostly naked and fooling around with Cynthia Rothrock.

But I digress.

This movie is bonkers. Yes, there are long scenes you won't care about where they're just... talking to people. Yes, the brother is obnoxious and feels kinda pointless. Yes, there are multiple double-crosses, but...

The movie never gets tired. You just go from scene to scene, with a tiny bit of filler between the silly action sequences, and eventually, you realize that it's over, but it feels like it just began!

Also... there's a pro-wrestler involved.

Yes, you heard right. One of the big goons for the guy who wants cars from Carradine is played by Professor Toru Tanaka! It's great to see Toru having a great time, and he plays well off of Carradine.

Carradine, for his part, is having a blast playing a Bond Villain type of bad guy, and it really is fun to watch him revel in his badness. He's been drinking recently, you can tell, but! He seems to be relatively sober on-set, and that just makes it more fun.

As for Chad... well... he's a Chad. He's trying, and his acting skills aren't abysmal, but he's not his dad, and he's not an action movie star. He seems like he'd be pretty decent in some smaller dramatic roles, working his way up to stardom, but he was given the starring role based on his last name alone.

Don't let me make you think this movie isn't amazing, though.

It's awesome, and you should check it out!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Thursday Art Walk 304: Maximum Comfcomf

In Which My Birb Is Super Comfy

I tend to muddy my English with silliness on occasion. One of my favorite turns of phrase is "comf-comf". For me, that's the linguistic identifier for maximum comfort. So of course, on the one day this week that's over 30℉(-2℃), I drew a quick sketch of Dedbert swaddled in fluffy blankets, experiencing superior comfcomf.

"Comfcomf"; washable marker and graphite on sketchpad; 2020

I'll almost certainly be remaking this marker sketch in the future, but for now, this will be today's art!

Go Enjoy Something (while I write some more!!!)
FC

Wednesdaymania 304: Brief Updates

In Which I Talk About Wrestling

I've been enjoying what wrestling has to offer in 2020 so far. New Japan is doing interesting things, AEW got renewed through 2023, WWE is trying to make things interesting (and it's working, though maybe not always in a good way), ROH basically stole Marty, and just... wrestling in general is pretty cool right now.

I've been following a bunch of wrestlers on Twitter, and I strongly recommend finding whoever you like in the ring and following them on Twitter. It can be either a delight or a head trip. Except for Cena. He just gives inspirational quotes and crap. It's kinda boring. Good for him.

The big news this week, I think, is that the latest Sumo basho wound up with Hakuho, one of the most active and successful Yokozunae I've seen since I started watching, pulling out of the tournament after suffering two losses in a row!

I've only ever seen him lose two or three matches since I started watching Sumo!

Holy cow!

But yeah, the only other news regarding wrestling that I have for now is that I'm actively writing my wrestling novel!

The novella I wrote was 12k words or so and has become Part 1 of a three-part book. I'm working on Part 2 now, and I've gotten 1600 words already! I'm super excited for this to keep growing and to finish Part 2 so I can see if the mechanics of the book really do work together. Then I can work on Part 3! And after the three parts of the story are done, then I can edit it - add in things that are missing, take out things that don't belong, tighten up language, loosen up action, etc. Then... look for publishers!

I'm so nervous. I haven't finished anything written in years. I haven't sent any manuscripts out in years.

But I'm super excited and I can't wait to share this story with the world!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Talk About Tuesday 304

Let's Talk About Stuff

It's a bright, sunny morning, and I am freeeeeezing! It's about 9℉ (-13℃), but it's early enough that I know it will eventually hit double-digits. Still, a predicted high of 19℉ (-7℃) isn't great, even on a windless day like this, so I'll be wearing layers and desperately smuggling hot chocolate and tea to my destination. Brr.

In other news, I am working on a lot of stuff right now, guys! I'm reading a few different books, writing either a second novella length story or the next part of my novel (depending on how the it meshes with the previous 12k word story I wrote!), and crocheting both the Downton Abbey shrug and a cozy zig-zag sweater (photos to be posted on completion).

So, what I'm saying is: I've been keeping busy!

Yeah, also, I did, in fact, write a 12k word novella for my partner's birthday and it might actually be part one of my first novel.

Which is why you might be seeing this image occasionally throughout the year:

Which I've used once already on ... Sunday this week? I think?

I might occasionally get hit with the writing bug and have to focus on the work as opposed to the blog. Right now, I'm still getting to know the main character of this part, and I really want it to work out!

As excited as I am, however, I do still have some semblance of plans for the blog!

• Tomorrow, I've got news from both the Professional and Sumo Wrestling worlds
• Friday will probably be the movie I watched either last night or the night before
• Saturday will probably be on the strange idle tower defense game I'm playing on Kongregate
• Sunday is a bit up in the air, but we'll do something :)
• Next Monday I'll be showing you my progress on the Lady Sibyl shrug
• Next Tuesday I'll be back to blather

Hope you see something to look forward to on this list!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Fiber Monday 304: Dowdy Duds

In Which I Start Something Both Modern And Vintage

I'm sure everyone's tired of Downton Abbey at this point. I know I am! I'm really pleased that the show existed and gave so many people work, but it was getting a little ridiculous, all that hype...

So anyway, a while ago, Lion Brand Yarn came out with some DA-themed yarns, and with those, they came up with some patterns. I am using the "Lady Sibyl Shrug" pattern, but... not the right yarn.

See, by the time I learned about (and saw) this pattern, they weren't selling the Lady Sibyl yarn anymore.

I did, however, have a large ball of a locally farmed, dyed, and spun merino lace in a colorway called "Red Hotdogs"... which is exactly that shade of bizarre red/pink/salmon. It's soft, though, and beautiful.

It's also a lace-weight yarn in a pattern that calls for something far more robust.

But... it's so pretty!

Okay, so what do you do when your yarn is the wrong size (or "gauge" as it's often known)?

You can do one of a few things:

• use a bigger hook so that the individual stitches are still the right size
• add pattern repeats if you're working from a repeated motif
• add extra yarn to bulk out your main color (usually in a similar, neutral, or complementary color)

I've opted for the second option, since using a larger hook on such a fine yarn would look hideous and I don't want to disrupt this strange yet wonderful color.

It's a fairly simple pattern, too!

This pattern is somewhat similar to a shell or fan pattern, but it's so fine and has so many bridges or nets that it's an addictive repetition. There are only four or five repeated rows, and I'll be needing to repeat these rows until it's 16 inches wide. It's much longer than the one they show in the pattern, too, but that's because I have a disdain for short-sleeved outerwear. I don't get it. You're covering your arms to both preserve modesty and to keep them warm. Why not commit?

With my dainty lace-weight yarn, I have a 2.25mm/B/1 hook I'm using.

I'm looking forward to finishing this pattern, since I've been dancing around it since probably 2018 or so!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Yup. Sorry, guys - I'm writing more of my novel (or a second short story, I'm not sure which!) today, and I needed the extra time :)

See you tomorrow for some Crochet!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Saturday Casual Gaming 303: Idle Pins on Kongregate

In Which I Am Very Sleepy

I'm typing this up at midnight because I'm 99% sure I'm going to either sleep in like a fool or wake up early to get things done, but either way, I am a sleepy birb.

When I'm tired but cannot sleep, I do one of two things: I watch videos on YouTube or I play idle games.

I have elected to play idle games, since for some reason (which I can't figure out) my computer has decided that a fairly good internet connection be damned, it's going to refuse to load YouTube videos. At all. It's horrifying. We're talking 144p.

Thankfully, you don't need a whole lot of crazy internet speeds or whatever to play a sweet little idle game like Idle Pins.

Idle Pins is a fairly new idle game on Kongregate. Made by publisher Arkshija and published on December 17, 2019, this game is a fun combination of RPG, idle game, sci-fi, and blatant copyright flummery. Seriously. There are a lot of references to other video games which the publisher is unlikely to have had a hand in. I'm not gonna complain about having my pins in the "Charmander" formation... or the one that looks like Sonic... or the one that looks like a Koopatroopa...

What I'm saying is that this game is very tongue-in-cheek. The story is pretty upfront about the fact that it doesn't really matter, but that's one of my big problems with it. When I logged on at the start of January, I had no idea what any of the mechanics were. You're given walls of text that make little to no sense and are left to do just... wait around and hope that something good happens. I'm still not 100% sure what pins go where in a formation!

You have pins, which are little buttons, and you're sending them to kill bad guys. You do this by loading them in formations (you start with "Noob", and it's trash, but you'll need it anyway) and hoping they don't die. Pins are... basically idle Pokemon. Except instead of kidnapping them and forcing them into combat, you either find or create them. This is also a little confusing at first, but here is my advice for if you're going to start playing this game:

1. If you have two pins that are the same (such as, a pair of "Alpha" pins), drag one on top of the other in your inventory. This will fuse them and make them stronger (two "Alpha" make one "Beta" for instance).
2. If it seems like you should be able to do something (crafting, tuning, etc) but you can't figure out how, just chill. You haven't found that ability yet.
3. Don't freak out about Tuning or the SynthLab. Tuning is a way to improve your pins with extra stats. SynthLab adds batteries to your pins and levels them up. You'll find batteries eventually, or you can deconstruct the higher tier pins you have (Gamma and up) for energy. Again, don't worry about this.
4. Bosses will kill you a lot early on.
5. You're not gonna keep the cool pins when you soft reset after Area 4 on the game map, so don't invest too heavily in them.

While the game did frontload a lot of conflicting or confusing info early on, I found that after I started to accumulate Formations and Unlockables (and even Event Items!), the game was better able to explain itself.

If you're looking for an idle game that asks you to practice some basic logic and reading comprehension, then definitely give Idle Pins a try. Now that I kind of understand what I'm doing, it's a lot of fun!!! Arkshija has done a great job here, and the fact that they're continually updating and tweaking the game tells me that they care about the game itself and how much fun you'll have playing it.

I'm going to bed now :)

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Filmic Friday 303: Pacific Blue and the Roku Channel App

I don't always use this blog to talk about tv,
but when I do, it's primo nonsense.

I don't watch a whole lot of tv. It's not something I wear like a badge of honor or anything, I just don't really do the whole... programming thing. I usually go online, watch movies, or check things out on my Roku.

Well, the Roku has an app called the "Roku Channel", and it's become my new best friend.

See, the Roku Channel has some of the tv shows I never saw growing up in the 1990s, and I remember tv as being delightfully cheesy back then, so when the opportunity to watch Pacific Blue came up... I had to do it.

Woo, 90s!

So what the heck is Pacific Blue?

Santa Monica Pier needs protecting, and the best way for cops to patrol a pedestrian-heavy area is by foot or... bike.

Yeah.

It's bike cops.

CHIPS without engines.

And with very muscular legs

The world of Pacific Blue, however is what attracts me, far more than the police-procedural-but-on-a-beach aspect. This is a world where drugs are plentiful on the pristine beaches of Santa Monica, people have relationship issues, there's someone stealing and stripping cars, and...

Micky Dolenz from the Monkees is the mayor.

Yes. You read that right.

It's incredible.

So yeah, this show is a blatant ripoff of Baywatch, but it's got those sweet 1990s XTREME BIKING camera angles, it looks great, the music is awesome, the acting is... well, let's face it, it's very Baywatch.

If that sounds like your cup of tea - a cop show on bikes surrounded by models in bikinis - then swing on over to your Roku and look up the Roku Channel to see it! It's absolutely worth a half hour of your time at least :)

Go Enjoy Something,
FC

Thursday Art Walk 303: Thank You Liger

In Which I Finish!

Remember how last week I gave you a black-and-white photo of my in-progress picture?

Here's the finished product!

"Thank You Liger"; permanent marker on Sketch paper, 2020

I coordinated the bubbles using the lyrics for Jushin Thunder Liger's theme song. Actually, I'm trying to figure out how to do a digital version of this style so that I can start doing commissions based on people's favorite songs, poems, lyrics, etc!

The color pallet for this picture is white, two shades of red, silver, gold, and black (I actually can't tell which color Liger's cape is, so I used both metallic shades).

Any suggestions for my next bubble project? How about any suggestions for next week's Art in general? I'd love to hear your guys' thoughts!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Wednesdaymania 303: The State of Wrestling in 2020

In Which I Blather About Wrestling

It's a new year, and wrestling is... very different than it was in January of 2019.

Let's go through, company by company, and see what's up on the Wrestling front as of 15 January, 2020!

WWE:

• RAW and Smackdown numbers are down pretty badly
• NXT has massively risen in popularity
• Local people are actually talking about wrestling now in my home town
• The Big Show is back in the ring
• R-Truth isn't a punchline, he's throwing the punchlines. And he's great.
• There is a lot more money being funneled to the talent.

ROH:

• The outlook is pretty grim, actually :(
• Due to talent being gobbled up by pretty much every other promotion, ROH is struggling to keep their roster up
• They managed to keep Marty Scurll by:
• paying him a ton of money
• making him booker
• telling him he only needed to wrestle a few times a year

NJPW:

• Despite losing a lot of talent (Kushida, the Bucks, Cody, Kenny, etc), NJPW has managed to really soup-up their roster with some amazing Young Lions (Karl Fredericks and Clark Connors) and really pushing their great talents (Naito, Ibushi, Shingo, Takahashi, etc)
• The LA Dojo and the US shows are fantastic
• Jushin Thunder Liger retired
• It's really fun, but there's a definite change in how matches flow. It's both more and less western, and the only way to explain that is to see it.

MLW:

• Holy mole, they lost a lot of talent when AEW formed
• Still, they have held onto some great guys and worked well with their roster to create interesting programming
• Also, they signed on with ICM Partners with an eye to better TV deals in the future, which could be huge.
• There's a lot of upward momentum, I think, despite the blows they took to their roster.

NWA:

• Oof, the Cornett stuff was bad, but they handled it fairly well, once people pointed out that there was flummery afoot.
• Dat roster, tho - it's both one of the best and worst rosters in wrestling, with some of the most charismatic and fantastic wrestlers... as well as some who I don't get why they're popular, but that's my own opinion, and you should really see the show for yourselves.
• Question Mark. That's all I'll say. Make your own judgments.
• I love, love, love the commercial segments, the cheesy set, the music... it's the real deal, and I love how corny it is. It's its own beast.
• Nick Aldis continues to be a National Treasure, and having Big Poppa Pump show up is amazing.
• Yes.

AEW:

• From their inception and debut, AEW has grown by leaps and bounds
• They have one of the most bizarre and interesting rosters of any show right now
• The seamless blending of internet content and television content, along with the way both storytelling mediums mix, is fantastic and definitely sets it apart as a new creature
• They just got renewed through 2023
• I really, really, really want to see more every time I watch
• I still don't really get the appeal of Britt Baker in the ring, but I like her as a person. Same with Brandi.
• I'm not 100% behind Riho as women's champion, because I feel like the storytelling is fairly lackluster with her.
• I'm 100000000% behind Kris Statlander, and I am beyond thrilled with the interactions between her and Orange Cassidy on BTE.
• Oh man, just... I love this company, and I hope they continue to grow and improve.

IMPACT:

• It's last here because I know next to nothing about it
• They employ some of my favorite workers, but I can't watch the show (legally), so I have no idea what's going on there.
• Hope everyone's getting paid!
• Hope everyone stays safe!
• Have fun, guys!

So those are my thoughts on wrestling as it stands today!

Any companies I should look into and cover more? Anything anyone would like to add? Let me know!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Talk About Tuesday 303

In Which The Blather Continues Unabated

It's Tuesday, which means this doofus gets their blab on! This past week has been very odd, for me. A lot has happened, but not much has gotten done, if you follow.

I've been to the post office and educated on the proper boxes to use for shipping if I want to ship things cross-country or internationally only to discover the sample boxes I brought home aren't quite long enough... I've been asked to help my dad out with some tech stuff. I've helped my sick partner out and also done a bunch of laundry. I took back some returnables. I've stared for hours at a blinking cursor trying desperately to get the words out.

It's been busy.

Not much has been finished (besides laundry and recycling).

I haven't even seen an un-reviewed movie lately! Though I did rewatch Hocus Pocus...

Needless to say, I feel a little off-kilter and adrift. I have four days to finish that short story, and the worst part is that I know I can do it. I just... am having a hard time doing it.

Regardless.

It's time to talk blog.

• Tomorrow I'll talk about some more wrestling - probably about how awesome Wrestle Kingdom was, but also maybe about some other coolness
• Thursday I'll have a finished work of art for you
• Friday I'll find a movie to talk about (possibly Strangers on a Train!)
• Saturday I'll tell you about a very weird game
• Sunday we'll talk noodz again, I'm pretty sure
• Monday will have me showing off how big that Scrapghan we started is, but also the start to a vintage-style crochet project I've been putting off.
• Next Tuesday I'll blather some more

It's shocking how quickly my coffee has run out. I'm still fuzzy-headed because we have some new wildlife (well, not new exactly, just loud).

The other night, an owl sat outside my window and called out in a way I only associate with meeting mates for over an hour and a half - it was past midnight. Last night, around midnight, a coyote decided that it needed to scream-howl for a few minutes. Usually, this isn't such a big deal, but it was so weird-sounding that my brain went on vigilant-mode and wouldn't let me relax. Thankfully, YouTube has my back and I threw on a 10 hour video of a blizzard, which put me right out.

Still, I'd like to start waking up earlier instead of sleeping later, and that's hard to do when nature doesn't want you to get some dingdang sleep.

I'll be working on some stuff today (including my story!) and hopefully that will help things work out for the next week or so!

I also want to start making a cardigan, so keep an eye out for that on Mondays ;)

For now,

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Fiber Monday 303: Failure is Always An Option

In Which I Have Failed!

Yup, you read that right, I've botched it :)

But FC, you may be thinking, if you've botched it, then why do you seem so happy?

Ah, my friends, when you fail at one project, it opens the door to another.

My failed earwarmer

I was originally working from this pattern, but then the unfathomable happened: I ran out of yarn.

Normally, this would be a Very Big Problem, but since I was using leftover yarn to begin with, I decided that I'd fulfill one of my dreams this year. 2020 might just be the year of the Scrapghan!

What the heck is a Scrapghan?

So, you know how when you're working on projects, you'll occasionally have a few yards of leftover yarn? A Scrapghan is a blanket made from your leftovers. There are, of course, infinite versions of the Scrapghan, but I've come up with my own version of a Granny Square to do this with!

First, form a Magic Ring and chain 3, then yarn over, put it through the circle, yarn over, pull through 2 loops, yarn over, put it through the circle, yarn over, pull through two loops, yarn over, pull all the way through.
Basically, you're forming a starting 3dc cluster!

From your first cluster, chain 3, then make another 3dc cluster and chain 3 again.

two clusters with chains after each

Then make two 3dc clusters without chaining between them, then chain 3.

I know, it looks a little wonky, but trust me!

After that chain-3, you make a 3dc cluster, chain 3, make two 3dc clusters, and chain 3. Then you slip stitch into the top of the first cluster you made!

Pull your magic circle closed, and you have a strange little flower!
How cute!

Now that we have our center spoke, the pattern is pretty simple.

You slip stitch over to the next ch3 space, chain 3, then dc twice. Then you ch3, then dc 3 times in the same space! You've just formed a corner.

My new starting corner.

Now, once you have a corner, you're just going to yarn over and slip your hook between the clusters that are right next to each other. Dc three times, then move onto the next ch3 space to make another (dc 3, ch3, dc 3) in the space. Repeat this all the way around. I know that slipping between the closer petals can be a pain, but it's worth it!

You can see a rectangle forming!

Don't forget to slip-stitch into the top of your starting ch3 and slip stitch to the next ch3 so that it's easier to start your next round.

A handsomely completed round!

Now keep doing that until you start to run out of yarn again. Once you're down to about a foot of yarn left, it's probably a good idea to slip a stitch marker onto the last stitch you completed and set the rectangle aside until you have more scrap yarn.

Which will take a while for this yarn, because I had gotten to 50 rows
on the earwarmer before I was forced to admit defeat...

So there you have it - you can turn negatives into positives through the magic of switching gears. Yes, this means no earwarmer, but! Now I have a fallback project for when I'm between designs.

I'll try to figure out a better way to write out this pattern (and possibly chart it for those of you who operate better with charts), but for now, I hope this helps you start your own vaguely rectangular blanket :)

Go Enjoy Something,
FC