Talk About Tuesday: Goodbye to 2019

In Which We're Closing Out the Decade

Happy New Year's Eve, everyone! Tomorrow, when you come back, we'll have a nice Wednesdaymania for you (I hope, lol) and it'll be the dawn of a new decade!

This past year was rough, globally, both politically and due to natural disasters and other horrid things. This is often the case, but 2019 felt especially cruel in a lot of ways. I'm not going to get too far into it, but man... koalas... poor koalas.

Anyway, as far as the blog went, I think I did a fairly good job keeping up with everything and making sure that I got words on the page, pictures in the right place, and I was only inaccurate a few times! Not bad, for someone with no journalistic training...

For the next year (and decade - no I still can't get over that!) I hope to continue blogging along, though there may be changes in format or content as the mood strikes.

Looking back, I didn't fulfill most of my goals for 2019, which doesn't surprise me, though I do have a lot of completed projects I'm proud of - especially crochet! I hooked so much yarn in 2019!

I hope that I've managed to entertain you, my few and fabulous readers, and I hope to continue to do so in the coming year.

Also, it's really gross out today, in this area (and many others, from what I hear), so be careful, be safe, and be merry.

Don't drink and drive.

Do have a very Happy New Year!

Also, I finished that hat!!!

I think I'll maintain my usual format for the time being, so again:

• Wrestling tomorrow
• Art on Thursday
• Movies on Friday
• Games on Saturday
• Food on Sunday
• Crochet on Monday
• Blather on Tuesday ;)

See you in the future!

(And how do you all feel about a slightly more 20's vibe to the blog in the coming year?)

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Fiber Monday: A New Hat For A New Year!

In Which It's The End of the Decade!

Well, it's here. The penultimate day of 2019. Tomorrow is New Year's Eve Day, and this will be the last project of 2019. I'll absolutely have it done by tomorrow.

It's a hat, in case you're wondering lol

The pattern I'm using is called The Aniak Beanie, and it's a very fun pattern to make. I'm probably going to have to use this spiralled shell stitch elsewhere! Made with five easy stitches, this hat is a great advanced-beginner project. All you need are: chain stitches, slip stitches, single crochet, half-double crochet, and double crochet. That's it. That's all you need!

It's taken me maybe four hours to get to about 6.5-7" in height, and the pattern calls for 9.5", so I'm nearly there. It's such an easy repetition that it'll be hard to stop.

I'm using a 5.5mm hook (an I-hook) and Caron Simply Soft yarn, which is a worsted weight. It's obscenely soft. One of my awesome sisters got me the yarn, which is in a colorway called "Sunset Autumn", for Christmas (along with three other skeins, though they're all green!). I kinda like the way the shells look a little like turkey feathers, and this will make an excellent fall hat. I'm not sure if I'll try a pompom - I'm kinda trash at making them.

If you're looking for this yarn, here's some closeups of the yardage and weight, also the color!

It's very cute!

As for why I'm posting this blog as late as I am... well... I had "help" this morning keeping me from the upload:

She's sulking because I won't let her sit on my lap while I work.
Sorry, kitty, I need to be able to lean forward!

And that's it for today's penultimate blog of 2019!

Tune in tomorrow for the final entry, my plans for next year, and the finished hat!

Go Enjoy Something, guys!
FC

Survival Sunday 252: Parmesan Spaghetti Ramen

In Which This Is My Last Noodle of 2019!

Well, here we are, two days out from the end of the decade. It's been a wild year, guys!

I figured we'd round out the year with the last of our East-Meets-West noodles - a spicy Parmesan pasta! This came from another one of our Umai Crates, and we had very high hopes for it, since the last few Italian-inspired bowls had been so freakin good. This was a pretty standard setup, too, which was good, because I was already tired from putting together Christmas gifts and we made this a couple of weeks ago!

As you can see, it warns you that it's spicy, but it's also welcoming and cute.
Very Japanese.

It's a 3-minute bowl, so I pulled out the packets and poured in the hot water and let it sit for the full three minutes.

Which was just enough. If you like your pasta very soft, go for 3:30.

Since we're al dente people, it was time to drain the pasta and add the flavor packets! I was at a loss at first as to what the green packet could have been, but that's because I don't read instructions very well, lol.

On the left is the tasty spicy tomato sauce in the red packet.
The green packet on the right was the Parmesan cheese!

A word from the wise: Don't fiddle with your lid too much before you drain the water, because it will detach too much, and then you'll be constantly fighting to keep the noodles in your bowl without scalding your fingers.

Overall, I'd say it was worth it, though!

Almost finished! Look how quickly that cheese started melting into the noodles!
Seriously, there was about 50% more of that before I picked up the camera!

A closeup so you can see just how good this looked...
Or you would see that if the color balance wasn't bad on my phone...

I should probably mention that we had this with some leftovers from a really great Christmas party we'd gone too earlier that week (the day before, in fact!)

Since there was a fair amount of food in the leftovers box, we picked out some of the choicest sausages and added those to our spicy Spaghetti Ramen experience!

10/10 do recommend!

In the end, the sauce was just tomato-y enough to get the tomato-ness of it, but not so much so that it overpowered the meat, noodles, and spiciness! Actually, I was unimpressed with the spice-factor at first, but it was a sneaky spice that crept up on you the more you ate it. I really like this bowl, and I thought that, while there could always have been more cheese, what we got was really nice and went well with everything.

Overall, I'd have to say that this particular fusion was not only successful, but it's something I'd buy regularly if it was available locally! Really nice.

That'll about do it for me, today, guys.
Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Saturday Casual Gaming 252: Gaming When You're Sick

In Which I hate this cold so much

As so often happens after Christmas, I have caught the Crud. My head is full of gross, my lungs are full of gross, my mouth tastes like despair, and my eyes feel like they're slathered with grease and sandpaper at the same time.

Perfect time to game, right? lol.

Not exactly.

In this state I can't focus or concentrate, so no strategy, puzzle, or Sim games. My reaction times are garbage, so fighting and platformer games are out of the question. Visual Novel? Nah, can't focus. Hidden Object? No way - eyes too blurry.

And so we're left with RPGs and Idle Games. Huh. My jams.

Except most RPGs have an awful lot of decision making involved...

Idle games it is, then.

Thankfully, both Kongregate and Steam abound with idle games for free, and Android/Google are nigh-bursting at the seams with them, so I'm well covered.

I'll be placidly tapping away on NGU Idle or Clicker Heroes or Trimps or something today for sure. It's that kind of day. I had been planning to tell you about an RPG I've been dabbling in, but... man, I'm so tired.

At least with Trimps I can just let them kill themselves for me instead of making choices and doing things lol

But tomorrow, I hope I'm well enough to talk to you about noodles and other things that make me happy.

Because I'm 100% done with this cold, and I hope it's nearly done with me.

Go Enjoy Something
(Eat some soup, take care of yourself!)
FC

Filmic Friday 251: A Christmas Carol (1954)

In Which I Discuss A Possibly Forgotten Classic

In 1951, Alastair Sim played Ebeneezer Scrooge in a famous adaptation of the Charles Dickins classic A Christmas Carol. It's still a popular version of the story to this day!

Three years later, CBS put on a variety show called Shower of Stars and made their own version, which I had literally never heard of until we found it on Hulu [Correction: It was actually Amazon Prime Video!], but... I 100% absolutely should have heard of it because it has Basil Freaking Rathbone and music by Bernard Herrman!!!!

Bennie Herrman?!

I love his music so freaking much!

But I'd never, ever heard of this version except perhaps as a footnote on Rathbone's Wikipedia page.

So we started it up and settled in.

I also had no idea it was available on DVD, though I have my doubts about the quality of the transfer...

Btw, that's March as Scrooge with the charity men behind him.

As far as adaptations go, this one's a bit more condensed than I'm used to, but it really works with the flow  - I mean, the thing's only about 53 minutes long without commercials, so it's not going to have the space for every detail. Still, I could've done with about five more minutes of Basil Rathbone as Jacob Marley!

It's got some great effects for ghostly apparitions and Basil is fantastic.

So you've got your basic story: Ebeneezer Scrooge (Frederic March) is a miserable turd who makes everyone around him miserable and is a miserly jerk, so his old partner decides "I'll do my best to keep this twit from hauling chains for eternity" and sets him up with some holiday spirits to smack some sense into him. This goes over as well as you might think, with Scrooge being disbelieving the whole encounter... until he sees evidence that yeah, his dead friend absolutely just hung out with him for a bit.

That is when things start going haywire for him.

See, this adaptation does one of my favorite things: the ghosts are people he knew or knows! Christmas Past arrives first, donning the guise of his lovely once-fiancee, Belle.

Who is charmingly lovely, though I doubt Ebeneezer ever saw her in such a state of undress in their past.
By Victorian standards, this young lady is naked.

Christmas Past reminds him that he used to love Christmas, but his love of money grew stronger than his love of Man and it cost him everything. His joy was consumed by coins. His heart was locked away by ledgers. His love left him so he could be with what she could see him loving more than her - cold hard cash.

Christmas Present appears next, and... honestly, the actor playing him is 1000% into the role. Ignorance and Want are nowhere to be found, as often happens in these adaptations, but neither is his big beard or his fancy robe! Then again, he kinda reminds me of Mr B Natural... but as a very accomplished (and soused) baritone. His "Very Merry" song will get stuck in your head.

Oh, I didn't mention that this is kind of a musical?

Yeah, there's a bunch of musical numbers, though all of them combined probably take less time than the "Very Merry" song from Christmas Present.

See, Christmas Present is played by Scrooge's nephew, Fred, who comes off as a bit of a doofus, but a lovable one. The actor as the Ghost definitely cranks that affability up to about 93 and goes hard. He drags Scrooge around like a confused child on holiday with a distant uncle and shows him Christmas at the Cratchits' home. Tiny Tim sings a cute song, and this is what breaks through to the miserly man, who begs to know if Tim would survive. Spoilers: Uh... no. No he won't. Not if Scrooge doesn't pay his dad a living wage...

So of course, this is where they really take some liberties, because there's no Ghost of Christmas Future. At all. Present simply... leaves. And Scrooge finds himself in a graveyard that looks nearly identical to the one from that godawful Spirit pilot I watched on the DC App...

He encounters first his grave, then, while panicking, Tiny Tim's. With his heart fully shattered and rebuilt into something more approximating that of a decent human being, albeit one wracked with guilt and shame (so... 100% normal), Ebeneezer wakes up, pulls the "I'M NOT A MONSTER ANYMORE PLEASE LET ME HELP YOU, EVERYONE IN NEED" thing we're all used to from the end of every Christmas Carol adaptation, and goes to visit the Cratchits for Christmas Dinner.

This is a wonderful adaptation, and the scoring from Herrman really takes it over the top. You'd expect far less from a television adaptation on a variety show, but it's quite lovely, and I would love to see it again.

Even if that "Very Merry" song drives me freakin nuts lol.

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Thursday Art Walk 252

In Which It's the Last Art of 2019!

It's a beautiful sunny day today. There's leftovers in my fridge, my family have their gifts (including the Purrmaid!), and I have plans to go see a showing of Strangers on a Train at my local library. All in all, this is a fantastic December 26th.

Unfortunately, I have the Christmas Crud, which means that my throat hurts, my nose is leaking like a faucet, and all I want to do is sleep. I'll be 100% fine, though. This happens every year, it feels like, lol!

I'm not the only one, either...

"Christmas Crash"; permanent Marker on sketch paper; 2019

Poor Dedbert. The poor lil guy is so zonked from his exciting Christmas exploits that he's got his Santa hat dipped in his coffee! I'll give him the week off next week - it's been a while since I've done some bubbles :)

Here's hoping that your Christmas was merry and bright, and if it wasn't, then hopefully the new year brings you better days ahead.

I love you all.

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Talk About Tuesday 252

In Which I'm Busy lol

Today is a sunny day, most of our snow has melted, and I'm 90% done with Christmas stuff! So Excited!

Now I just need to remember to start next year's gifts on December 26th this year, instead of December 3rd next year...

So What's the Week Looking Like?

• Tomorrow is Christmas. Don't look on the blog. I'll be busy eating and opening gifts :P
• Thursday will be something fun and wintry!
• Friday... maybe Fear And Loathing?
• Saturday... Poker?
• Sunday is a bit up in the air, since I doubt I'm cooking much in the next couple days...
• Next Monday, stay tuned for something creative-like...
• Next Tuesday I'll give you weather and blog updates

So that'll do it from me today...

Because if I have to have it stuck in my head, so do you!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Fiber Monday 252: Purrmaid Complete!

In Which My Semi-Aquatic Feline is Finished! 

I mean, look at that cutie! Her lil face!

I'm pretty pleased with how her face came out, though it did take me three hours to figure out how to make her nose look decent! I'm not an embroidery master, guys. I'm nowhere near an embroidery master. I think it's cute, though :) She'll make someone happy in a couple of days ;)

Today is a little rough, I'll admit. I have several gifts to finish, then I'll have to wrap them and I just feel overwhelmed. I do this every year. Why am I like this?!

Deep, calming breaths.

It will get done. All will be well. And then tomorrow and Christmas Day will be really cool.

I should get back to the other gifts I'm making, though.

Happy Christmas, everyone!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Survival Sunday 251: Leftover Rice Eggstravaganza!

In Which I Use Up Some Leftovers!

By now y'all know I like to experiment in the kitchen, especially with leftovers, frying pans, and eggs.

So it shouldn't shock you that I'm coming up with weird egg fried rice knockoffs.

I promise, guys, this tastes really good, so don't be afraid to try it out!

Start with your basic ingredients!

For this Eggy Rice, you'll need:

• Leftover rice
• 2 slices Canadian bacon (sliced into bite-sized pieces)
• 2 eggs
• salt & pepper
• ketchup

If you have veggies, definitely add those too, because this? This is pure cholesterol right now. Oops.

Step 1: Slice everything non-rice-or-egg and fry it on low heat.

It's usually pretty good to start low with stuff like Canadian bacon. It doesn't have a high fat content, so putting it in too hot of a pan will cause smoking and smoking is bad for you. This is also when I'd add any veggies if you've got them - peppers, onions, carrots, even corn and/or peas! This would go well with basically any combo of fryable veggies. You could even use tiny cubes of potato or sweet potato.

Basically, you want these things to get a bit toasted on all portions. Feel free to increase the heat if you feel it's not cooking the way you'd like!

As that's happening, let's focus on our eggy rice!

The next thing you want to do is crack two eggs into the bowl (or other container) of your rice.

And then stir it up!

You want to make this into a slightly frothy, fairly homogeneous concoction, with each grain of rice coated in egg. You also want to season your rice with salt, pepper, etc at this time.

After combining the eggs, rice, and seasoning, you'll be adding your frothy egg mix to the pan with the meat and/or veggies! This can look a bit weird, but bear with it, and immediately begin mixing the egg-rice and veggies/meat together in the pan over low to medium heat!

And yes, it's quite... voluminous!

At this point, squirt a goodly serving of ketchup in there and mix well. You can use any kind of sauce you like (uh.. actually, maybe don't use ranch, that separates under heat and could be kinda gross unless you're using a dry mix...) like mustard, soy sauce, etc. Whatever you think would taste good hot with eggs and rice. I might add a few splashes of soy sauce and some gochujang next time...

Now toss it in a bowl and eat it!

Obviously, you want to make sure that the eggs are cooked if you live in America, since our eggs are washed and therefore more prone to bacterial infiltration than fresher, unwashed eggs in say, Japan. You may find that you prefer to cook this over a higher heat until the eggs are more separated from the rice. You may find that you prefer a slower, lower, creamier version making the dish more like a rice-egg-pudding. However you make this, feel free to leave me a picture in the comments or Tweet at me or something (@TheFilthyCasua8)!

And now, since you've been so patient, here's the video version (lol).

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Saturday Casual Gaming 251: Starlight XMas

In Which I Play A Very Sweet Game

Back in the earliest days of my being an internet gamer, I discovered a little studio called Armor Games. Of course, within a year, Armor Games became a massive publisher, but back when I first encountered them, they had a few lil Flash games under their belt and hadn't yet seen massive success. Through Armor Games, I found a lot of RPGs and weird action puzzlers that I loved, but then Christmas rolled around, and I found Starlight Xmas.

A fun, clever puzzle game by Zedarus on Kongregate

The goal of the Starlight series is to use your mouse to guide a field of stars into position. You're rotating a 3D field until you form a constellation, at which point you have beaten the level! This mechanic is so clever it's no wonder that there's at least two main games at this point, and to top it all off, the music is gorgeous (if a bit loud at times).

It's perhaps a one-trick pony, but when your trick is this cool, you don't really need more.

This is not a game for the adrenaline junkie. It's not intense in any way shape or form. It's peaceful. It's tranquil. It's occasionally frustrating as you search for just the right position to make the reindeer appear... In short, this is a borderline Grandma Game, and I love it even more for it. With its simple, elegant art style and its easy-to-learn-lifetime-to-master gameplay, it's the perfect thing to curl up with a cup of cocoa and play through.

If you're looking for a sweet, simple game to put you in a holiday mood, why not give it a look-see? I mean, you're probably gonna need to activate Flash or install a substitute in order to play it, but it's so great that I'm down with that. It's one of those games where I replay it every year to see if I can beat my old high scores, and every year, I remember why I love it.

Happy Holidays,
Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Filmic Friday 251: Can't Stop Here This Is Santa Country

In Which I Put Off Fear And Loathing for one more week, lol

It's going to be Christmas in FOUR DAYS

Oh crap.

I am soooooo not ready.

I never am.

Since I'm an unprepared potato, I thought I'd let you in on a little secret: I kinda don't like sentimental Christmas movies. Like... at all.

But I'm also not fond of comedies (I have a soft spot for Ernest Saves Christmas, but that's because I'm a 90s kid).

So what the heck kinda Christmas movies does a nerdy birdy like me like to watch?

Stupid ones, mostly, it turns out. Stupid movies, action movies, and the occasional detective romp.

My top five Christmas movies are:

• Die Hard
• Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang
• How The Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)
• Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas
• A Charlie Brown Christmas

That's... a weird top five, right? I mean, no The Santa Clause, no National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (and probably never that one thanks to the other Chevy Chase movie I watched this year... ), no A Christmas Story or Polar Express or Elf...

I mean, not even Rudolph or Frosty, and they were my childhood favorites. Seriously, I'm pretty sure I wore out the VHS tapes for both of them...

Why these five?

They all mean something to me.

Die Hard and KKBB were movies I saw for the first time with the love of my life, and that sticks with ya. It doesn't hurt matters any that they're just solid, wonderful, fun movies on their own, either.

Grinch was ubiquitous in my youth, but I was madly in love with Karloff's voice and cadence. I was also very disappointed to find out that my singing voice would never reach the deep, buttery tones of Thurl Ravenscroft...

And yeah, that's the name of the dude who sang the song.

And yeah, that's possibly the most badass name on Earth...

Emmet Otter was another childhood treasure, but it became a quest of sorts for me, where I was constantly hunting down the tv cut we'd all seen as kids where Ma mumbles about the fox falling off the dock. I was searching for it for my mother's sake, since she'd expressed a wish for it, and I'm frankly terrible at gift-giving. Suddenly, in college, I became friends with my Film And Editing Friendo, who was at long last able to conclude my search. It's a friendship that's still strong today, and I'll always be grateful for the one year where I actually got someone what they wanted.

And I know I said that I wasn't a saccharine Christmas movie person, but there's something about Charlie Brown, man. Maybe it's because we grew up surrounded by Snoopy (my parents are both fans). Maybe it's because between Charlie and Mr Rogers, that was the only real exposure to jazz music I was able to get without anyone complaining. Maybe it's just that sometimes, you want a bunch of kids singing "loo loo loo" around a crummy little tree that someone tried so hard to get for them. All I know is that it doesn't feel like Christmas to me until I hear the music from this cartoon.

Btw, my next five faves are:

• Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (Rankin/Bass)
• Frosty the Snowman
• Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (Fleischer/Jam Handy)
• The Muppet Christmas Carol
• White Christmas

If you think that's weird, that's 100% okay. I'd probably find your top ten fav Christmas flix to be a bit weird too.

This does make me wonder what kinds of holiday films there are for the other... dozen or so non-Christian holidays there are during this season...

Maybe next year...

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Thursday Art Walk 251: 1950s Gray

In Which I Made More Art!

This week's prompt was "1950s, Gray", so that's what I've done. I wish I'd had more shades of gray available in my sharpies, but sadly, I only had silver and... gray. There weren't really any tones I could do, so I did my best with the design :)

"1950s Gray"; permanent marker on printer paper; 2019

Dedbert here is posing with his new guitar in front of an artificial (likely aluminum) Christmas tree that's been painted green with silver and gray baubles all over it. The topper is a 1950s Sputnik Star, which, I mean... does that make him a Commie? Oh no!

Actually, I'm surprised that the entirety of the nation didn't rebel against the very idea of Santa during this period. Guy dressed in red, breaking into your home in the middle of the night to distribute possessions gained from who knows where... sounds kinda socialist to me. Or just crazy.

But yeah, That's today's art!

I have been kind of obsessing over the idea of winter far more than the reality this year. I mean, yesterday was pretty nice - light snowfall, temperatures just below freezing, hardly any wind...

But today is brutal.

It's 11℉ (-11℃) and blowing a gale, which means that it feels like it's even colder. According to the internet, it feels like it's -13℉ (-25℃). This is nuts.

This is not what I want from mid-December. I don't even like this in mid-January when it's kinda normal.

December should be just around freezing with nighttime dips into the teens, if it must.

Ugh.

I think I'll just curl up with Dedbert in front of his fake tree and listen to him play guitar.

Come back next week to see what Dedbert got for Christmas!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Wednesdaymania 251: Wintermania Week 3

In Which We Cover Our Final Winter/Christmas Themed Wrestler of the Season...
And no, it's not Barry Horowitz.
Sorry.

What is the most easily recognizable symbol of the Christmas season? Is it silver bells? Well, there were the Ding-Dongs at one point... but no. What about Christmas Trees? We've already covered the Christmas Creature...

It's Santa, guys. It was always gonna be Santa!

Now, I can't cover every single wrestler who ever donned the red suit, but for me, there is one wrestler who will forever embody that jolly old elf, and that's Mick Foley.

Yes, the guy who played Mankind, Cactus Jack, and Dude Love.

Yes, the guy who Undertaker threw off the Cell.

He's also obsessed with Christmas and Santa Claus, and for me, he's always going to be Wrestling's Best Santa.

Look at this Merry Fellow!

The man has had so many concussions and body traumas that he forgets which house is his and he can't always remember the names of all his kids, but bless him, he's a fantastic Santa.

He even has a role in the 2014 documentary I Am Santa Claus!

So for me, that's who I picture when I think of Old Saint Nick, and that's where I'll leave you until Christmas has passed :)

Happy Christmas, everyone!

Go Enjoy Something
FC

Talk About Tuesday 252

In Which I Try To Blather

It's December 17 - one week from Christmas Eve (really, you're not expecting a Wednesdaymania on Christmas, right?) - and we just had a rainstorm and temperatures near 60℉ (15.5℃). Then it immediately fell back to about 30℉ (-1℃) and today it's 27℉ (-2.8℃). As you might be able to guess, my family is having issues adjusting to these rapidly fluctuating temperatures, so basically everyone's sick right now. Boo.

Also, my poor sinuses have no clue what's going on, and their solution is to feel dried up while simultaneously spewing mucus like there's no tomorrow.

Yay Christmas.

So what do you do when you're having your face leak and your family hacking and coughing like a children's ward in Victorian England (ooh, black lung joke!)?

You read.

And I read Jonathan Evison's Lawn Boy.

And what a wonderful book!

Lawn Boy is the story of Mike Muñoz, a young man trying to survive the world actively taking a dump on him while also struggling to find his place and learn just who exactly Mike Muñoz is. It's a journey of self-discovery, but unlike most literary explorations of someone trying to find themselves, this book is about as navel-gazing as a trip to the grocery store. There's introspection, sure - it's a first-person narrative where the narrator is constantly having the rug pulled out from under him - but it's not some twee little tale of a wealthy white blogger wandering around for 300 pages until they meet the right sexual partner and run off to Bali.

It's the story of a struggling artist who knows what art he wants to pursue in a world that just sees him as yet another Mexican to exploit (he's a born-and-bred Californian, his dad just happened to have Mexican heritage). Mike just wants to mow lawns and trim hedges for work, but his art is topiary, and the world just seems to crap all over him. Everything that could go wrong in this guy's life seems to (though thankfully it lends itself more to humor than tragedy!). His truck breaks down. One of his bosses gets arrested. His lawnmower gets stolen. His mom's tenant pulls the wrong tooth.

This isn't a book about socialites, it's a book about the guy mowing the lawn out back, so expect some snark that isn't founded on the idea that somehow people who live in big houses are the best people and that somehow the people who work hard to get things done are somehow inferior. It's not even the opposite, either. It's a book about complicated people and complex feelings...

And topiary.

And Disney.

And revolution on a very, very small scale.

And bespoke delis.

Basically, this book rocks, and if you're looking for something to remind you that the sun exists, that heat is a thing that can exist outside your house, and that dreams come in all shapes and sizes, this is definitely the book for you.

Heck, even if you don't think you'd like a story about a dirt poor guy struggling to survive in an inherently racist society, you should pick it up. At the very worst, you'll learn a thing or two about landscaping :P

So yeah, go read the Great American Landscaping novel and let me know in the comments what you thought of it, because as you might be able to tell, I loved it and I'll absolutely be reading Evison's other books! And by the way, if his name seems familiar, I've done a review of a Paul Rudd film based on one of his books! Does the title The Fundamentals of Caring ring a bell? Yeah. That's him.

So that's it for my book review this week!

Now what am I doing on this week before Christmas?

• Tomorrow we'll get our final Wednesdaymania for this month because I'll be busy opening gifts and eating good food with people I love next week.
• Thursday, I'll be doing my final Christmas Sketch!
• Friday will be about Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, because I'm not going to talk about Christmas movies this year, lol.
• Saturday will be another video game, possibly one that's a fusion of Poker and Dungeons and Dragons...
• Sunday will be a very interesting noodle bowl...
• Next Monday I'll have a finished Purrmaid to show you!
• Next Tuesday, I may be a little busy, but not too busy to shoot you a quick lil message on this blog!

Thanks for hanging out with me today, guys!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Fiber Monday 251: Purrmaid Week 2

In Which I'm On The Home Stretch!

I've been working hard on the Purrmaid, guys! In fact, I'm nearly done!

Here I'm working on the butt of the Purrmaid with a nice self-striping sock yarn!

I really wish I had a bunch more of that green/white colorway sock yarn that I used for the tail because it's gorgeous and would make truly wonderful socks. Sadly, I only had just enough for the Purrmaid :(

A slightly blurry shot of the finished head, body and tail!

I'm very proud of the job I did on the hands - They really do look like grabby little paws! And those ears! I was squeeing the entire time I crocheted them up and sewed them on.

Her lil toes!
Also, she's so tiny! Look at the size of that box of bulb pins next to her!
And that's the tip of my small sewing scissors on the other side!

I do have one last step for this little cutie, though, and it could make or break this project...

I need to embroider on her face.

Oh boy. You guys know I lack steady hands and the ability to keep eyes level...

This could be bad - or just really wonky and hilarious.

Stay tuned til next week when I show you if I turn her into a butterface...

Go Enjoy Something!
FC

Survival Sunday 250: Your First Solo Christmas

In Which I Give Festive Food Advice

So, you've decided to host Christmas this year.

Whether you've started out on your own and want to see if you can do this for yourself or you've simply decided to host your family for the holiday, you've come to the conclusion that you've got this and you're gonna make it a Christmas to remember! Congratulations!

Except you can't cook.

Well, you can, but not like on tv. Not like your parent or guardian growing up.

You don't have Aunt Ethel's buttermilk biscuit recipe. You have no idea how Nana made that pie you had over at her house in 98. All you have is the internet and a sneaking suspicion that you've bitten off more than you can chew.

Don't panic. You've got this.

The first thing you need to do is figure out how many people you're feeding and whether or not there are any dietary restrictions (rolling your eyes at Uncle Jim's Keto diet is one thing, but Cousin Rick's diabetes and your sister's nut allergy are no laughing matter!)

Next, figure out how many meals/snacks you're going to be expected to provide. If everyone's coming over in the morning, you're gonna want to make some breakfast or brunch, but that's pointless if they're showing up around 3PM or later. At that point it's snacks and supper!

Once you have your servings and timeframe figured out, you might begin to have an idea of what you want to feed everyone! But, oh no! All of these recipes on the internet are super confusing and/or complex!

Don't go for the twelve course Christmas Dinner on your first go, friend. It's just not going to do you any good to completely lose your mind before anyone shows up, hustling around, desperately trying to bake rolls and a turkey at the same time in your dinky apartment oven. Just don't. If they really expect that kind of masterwork from you they should have taught you how to cook everything before now.

Enter this venture with realistic (and merciful) expectations.

If you're doing breakfast, there's no shame in sneaking in those cinnamon rolls from a can. There's no law against serving a simple oatmeal for breakfast with slices of spiced apples (literally, just slice up some apples and toss the slices with cinnamon and sugar, maybe with a touch of nutmeg and/or ginger).

Some relatively simple recipes you might want to try for breakfast are:

• the clafoutis I made early on in this blog
• French Toast
• Pancakes (buy a mix - they'll have the instructions right on the package!)
• Muffins (you can make them from a mix, or if you're feeling ambitious, I also did muffins!)
• The aforementioned oatmeal (or grits, if you're southern, or cream of wheat if that's your thing)
• A box of festive donuts you picked up last night for just such an occasion

Once you've finished planning breakfast, you can think about snacks - everyone likes to nosh, right? Well, it's a good thing there's so many options out there!

• Ye Olde Vegetable Platter may be much-maligned in some circles, but I for one adore the simplicity and ease of baby carrots and chopped up broccoli on a plate with some cucumbers, celery, and if you've got some freaky people with you, fresh cherry tomatoes. Okay, so maybe I'm the freak for not liking tomatoes...
• Utz makes some insanely good white cheddar "Snoballs" this time of year. If you can track them down, they're an addictive little treat!
• For that matter, just grab some tasty chips and dips that you know everyone likes!
• If you've got some serious snack on, then I can suggest a simple chili dip that'll have everyone going back and forth:
• Take some bricks of cream cheese, let them get soft, then put them in the bottom of a baking dish (or one of the small, cheap foil brownie pans you can get at most Dollar Stores). Smooth everything out so you have a nice foundation layer of cream cheese. 
• Dump a can or two of chili on top of that cream cheese. If you have leftover chili in the freezer, you can thaw that out and use it for this, but canned is way more convenient. My dad hates beans in his chili so we usually do one pan with beans and one without.
• Dump a bunch of shredded cheese on top - we usually use a Mexican blend from the dairy case, but you can use anything you like.
• Pop that sucker in an oven at about 350℉ (175℃) until the cheese has melted and maaaaaybe developed a bit of browning. If you're using a foil pan, put a cookie sheet underneath it in case it warps!
• Take out and cool until you don't burn your mouth on it when you scoop it up with a corn or tortilla chip.
• Fresh fruits, pickles, and nuts are all also great ideas (just be mindful of any allergies!)

Great work - you probably have your snacks all figured out by now! But what if it's lunch they're after?!

• If it's just you, why not buy some really nice cheese and meat (or your favorite substitutes) and make yourself the sandwich of your dreams?
• Buy some frozen meatballs, cook them in a slow cooker with some pasta sauce. Buy some provolone cheese and some sub rolls - make meatball subs!
• Make a festive Christmas pizza with ham and pineapple! *dodges haters* or if you're not into hot fruit, may I suggest using red and green bell peppers instead? An excellent source of veggies and festive to boot!
• ... That chili dip is really good as a meal, too...
• You could just make chili?

To be honest, we usually have a big breakfast at my house and then just graze on snacks until dinner/supper time. My mom usually cooks a ham or a lasagna (which, yeah, that's way easier than you might think!) or something like that, but sometimes she'll shock us with a brisket or something else intense and rich and crazy.

But, again, if this is your first time? No one has the right to expect you to cook them ham or brisket. They can't even demand a turkey if you've never roasted one before. It's your rules this year, my dude(tte).

So what do you make for your final meal?

• Again, pizza or chili are perfectly acceptable options, provided you aren't just reserving lunch.
• Spaghetti is a fantastic first Christmas dinner - it's simple, relatively inexpensive, and then you can have garlic bread, and who doesn't love garlic bread? Vampires. That's who.
• I'm planning on doing my own version on here eventually, but a shepherd's/cottage pie is always a hit! Layer some browned meat and onions on the bottom of a baking dish (one with nice, high sides!), then put some veggies like corn and/or peas in the middle, then top it off with some delicious mashed potatoes (and yeah, you can use instant, and if anyone complains, tell them they can peel the potatoes next year if they're so offended). Pop that puppy in the oven at 400℉ (200-205℃) until the top gets a bit browned et voila, you have a fantastic meal for the whole family. Pro-tip: when you're mixing up mashed potatoes, you can add a dollop of cream cheese to them to make them even richer!
• Chinese Food is great if all else fails and/or your oven dies. This has happened to many a first-time-Christmas-Host. Takeout is there to save you.

Wonderful! Now that everyone's all doped up from your feast, there's probably at least one greedyguts (usually me) who is looking for a dessert. Cue the record scratch.

Oh yes. I'm bringing up dessert, too.

• Guess what? Half the "home-made" cakes my classmates would bring to bake sales were made from boxed mixes. Follow the directions on the box, and let Betty Crocker save your bacon.
• Guess what else? Those frozen eclairs and cream puffs? Those are great. Bam. You didn't have to cook, but everyone got something amazing.
• Hot Chocolate Minibar: Get together a bunch of weird hot chocolates you bump into at the grocery store - you know the ones. They'll have weird flavors or they'll just jump out at you with packaging. Pick up a bunch of those (and some plain hot cocoa if you're worried about the less adventurous guests). If I'm coming over, grab some instant coffee, too. You'll also want
• mini marshmallows
• candy canes (you can go pretty wild with these too)
• small flavored creamers
• a ton of spray whipped cream
• Don't want the stress of measuring out cookie making materials? Don't fret - let the experts help you and either get some nice cookies while shopping or get premade cookie dough
• It's cold outside (maybe), but ice cream never goes out of fashion
• Love your child relatives but mad at their parents? Leave out huge bowls of candy - M&Ms, Kisses, Reese's Cups, etc.

So you see, there's nothing to be afraid of. Don't overstress yourself this holiday season if this is your first time having people over.

I have only one other piece of advice for you:

Actually invite the people you're planning to invite. Don't just say "yeah, I'm having Christmas at my place", actually call them (or if you're like me and hate phones, message them) or send them a card or something. Heck, messaging and/or cards both involve writing, so you can make darn sure they know what's up.

And that's where your secret weapon comes in.

If you are broke. If you are completely incapable of cooking. If you have no access to groceries or restaurants.

There's still hope.

Make it a potluck. Make them bring their own food!

Go Enjoy Something!

FC

Saturday Casual Gaming 250: Silver and Gold

In Which Christmas is Very, Very Commercial

My earliest memories of gambling come from my cousin's copy of Pokemon: Red for the GameBoy. The Celadon Game Center was a great place to just kick back and spam the slot machines. It was the only way to get Porygon without trading with someone, and if you lived in the middle of nowhere like I did, trading was going to be a problem.

Point is, I kinda developed a bit of a habit where I would just... play the slots until the batteries ran out or someone wanted their GameBoy back. When I got my GameBoy Color, all bets were off and I became obsessed with timing and hot machines and... I basically became a 12 year old gambling addict.

So Slot machines and I have a bit of a bad history.

That don't mean I hate 'em, though...

Thankfully, I managed to cut things a bit close this year and just played a day or so of Holiday Slots Inc by Makopaz on Kongregate.

It's a pretty easy game, too

So basically, you're trying to win gifts, which you then spend on upgrades before delivering them to children around the world. The more gifts you deliver, the more people believe in you! The more people believe in you, the more clout you have, and you can open your own toy store! The more money you earn from that, the more upgrades you can get and then...

You infiltrate Hanukkah?

Yeah. You start taking over the entire holiday season, in fact, and eventually, you become so beloved by everyone, you earn money while waiting for the holidays to roll back around.

It's a very weird game with bizarre implications, but I kinda like it lol.

I should mention that I had the Goldenrod Game Center's music playing in my head the whole time I played...

I should also mention that this is a game I'm probably never playing again after this review because I can feel the attachment growing again, and I don't want to be an adult with a gambling habit. That would be bad.

That said, if you can trust yourself with slot simulators, then definitely give this one a try!

Go Enjoy Something!
FC